Behind the Smile, the story of Lek, a bargirl in Pattaya

The Story of Lek, a Bar Girl in Pattaya
'Daddy's Hobby'

The Problems of Thai Women Married to Foreigners

Often when a Western man falls for a Thai beauty half his age, he is often already in his later life (over 50, but often much older too). Sometimes, the foreigner (or falang/farang in Thai) will be so bowled over by the attention from such a much younger woman that he appears to his friends and family to have become insane.

The Problems of Thai Women Married to Foreigners

The Problems of Thai Women Married to Foreigners

The root of the problem, many older men would say, is that they have long been starved of attention by a society that is obsessed with youth. Women in other countries or continents may have other priorities in life like financial security.

So, the falang arrives in Thailnd, meets a pretty, attentive, young woman and wants to set up home with her. Sometimes, this means divorcing his Western wife or selling the family home, which any children may have rightly or wrongly earmarked as their due inheritance.

If the Western couple have drifted apart why should they not separate to pursue their individula happiness? And what right do kids have to expect to be given a property that they have not worked and paid for?

This often causes resentment and understandably so, although it may not be morally justifiable. There is nothing wrong with the pusuit of happiness - it is everyone's right, if it is not achieved to the detriment of others.

However, it does often cause resentment and this usually presents itself when the falang dies. He had probably promised to provide for his new Thai wife, but not actually gotten around to doing anything about it that would stand up in court.

If the falang has been lax in this regard, his family can exact their revenge. This happens often.

The Thai woman is left with the upkeep of a house that she would not ordinarily have been able to afford. Same with a car and they may even have had children. Children that she would not have had if she had known that she would be deserted penniless.

She could sell the house, you may say, but that is difficult in a small village if it is a Western style house and in a city it may be rented.

Furthermore, if the falang dies in Thailand then there are also funeral expenses to be met and if he dies abroad, she may want a relic of her spouse such as a piece of bone.

Western families who have been 'hurt' by the falang, but not by his Thai wife, can only take their anger out on her andprobably don't know how much she loved the falang or how much having a relic means to her.

It is vital for a falang who loves is Thai wife, to take adequate measures to protect her and her offspring. It is very important to modern Thai families that their kids get a very good education and it is vital that any loans or mortgages are paid off on death (perhas with insurance) in order t prevent financial hardship.

There should also be enough money in the kitty to pay for a decent funeral and the Thai woman must know how to access all these funds.

by Owen Jones

Copied from Package Holidays to Thailand with kind permission.



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BTS 1: Daddy's Hobby

BTS2: An Exciting Future

BTS3: Maya - Illusion
BTS4: The Lady in the Tree

BTS5: Stepping Stones

BTS6 - The Dream